I Fucking Hate You

“I Fucking Hate You!” and the car door slams. I look to the back seat and my eyes meet with those of the 10-year-old little brother who is watching his older sister walk away. It is 7:45am – What a great way to commence the day with my cranky and frustrated 13-year-old!!! I realize that the easiest way to release her negative, percolating energy is to scream profanity, slam the door and walk away mad. (I know that within seconds, she is delightfully enjoying her friends in the schoolyard!) I used to take this language and behavior personally with the first round of Mutant Ninja Teens; now I do not excuse this poor behavior, but I realize the roots and do not let it get under my skin! I take a moment to discuss what just transpired with the 10-year-old, who I know is ripe to learn this behavior – he is on the verge of becoming a teenager. But at this stage, he denounces his sister’s bad behavior as “over the top and inappropriate” - yes, these were his words!

The root word ‘fuck’ has simply taken over the teenage English language! I recently asked my older MN daughter why young people use the word ‘fuck’ so easily and so often. She said, “Because we like to!” It was not the answer I wanted to hear, but it was fair and honest. At times, I find the word ‘fuck’ rolling off my tongue as an exclamation, but I immediately feel shame. Teenagers do not feel bad when they use it. When I overhear teenagers conversing, one form or another of ‘fuck’ is in half of their sentences; Back when I was first attacked with a phrase consisting of a form of ‘fuck’, I was very insulted and shocked, but then I realized that I was giving the word way too much value.

‘Fuck’ as a noun - a fuck, a fucker or a mother-fucker. A few years ago when my son was late for school, I would go into his room and try and get him up. When he was really tired, he would yell, “Get the fuck out of my room.” I know he was using the word as a noun, but it came across as a lot more.

‘Fuck’ as a verb - ‘I fucked up’ – Who has not thought this or even said this out loud!

‘Fuck’ as an adverb – ‘absofuckinglutely’ or ‘You are fucking annoying’ – This is what my MN Teen told me the other day, and yes, I undoubtably was annoying in her mind, as I had asked her for help a few times with no success. I was not at all sympathetic this time with the use of the word ‘fuck‘ or the tone of her statement. I will save this for another BLOG entry!

‘Fuck’ as an compound/interjection – ‘Fuck you!’, ‘Fuck off!’, ‘Fuck no!’, ‘Fuck that!’: Recently a mother told me that her teenage daughter for the first time yelled at her, ”Fuck you!”; then her daughter ran off afraid of the repercussions.

‘Fuck’ as an adjective – ‘She is such a fuck up!’, ‘He is fucking beautiful!’ or ‘What a fucking idiot!’ or ‘None of your fucking business’ : the ‘fuck’ word seems to make everything sound more dramatic and intense, but every sentence could use a more descriptive and less vulgar adjective and the point would still be made effectively.

When I was little, my father used to threaten to wash my mouth out with soap if I used profanity. And one day he did! Having your mouth washed out with soap is not something you ever forget! My father did not swear at home, but I know he did in the factory where he worked. One day, I walked in and heard him angrily yelling and words like ‘fuck’ were flying through the air as plentiful as the oxygen and nitrogen. Back when I was a teenager, we did not dare call our parents out for anything like that. Some would call it fear, I call it respect.These days, if I swore and told my children not too, they would call me a hypocrite. If I washed their mouths out with soap, they would call Child Protective Services. I still do not condone the use of any words that contain ‘fuck’ and I ask my MN Children not to use these words, but I know I am up against a permissive society as far as  vocabulary and phraseology are concerned.

I hope that you all forgive my incredible vulgarity and profanity in this entry: I am now going to take a shower and scrubbed myself clean with soap!

Ninja Mom

 

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