About a month ago, I was driving with my little Ninja Son who was singing along with the radio; truthfully I was paying little attention to him, when in the middle of the song, he told me that the song reminded him of his older brother and sister – my older Teenage Mutant Ninja Children. I then started to really listen to this song with an incredibly catchy tune and great vocals. The lyrics were:
So what we get drunk So what we smoke weed We’re just having fun We don’t care who sees So what we go out That’s how its supposed to be Living young and wild and free
And this was the more mild part of the song! Yikes!!!
I knew that my little son did not understand all of the words, and yet he knew enough about the words and about his teenage siblings to articulate that the song reminded him of them.
I have never been the Ninja Mother who promoted partying for my MN Teenager. I have never been the NInja Mother who partied with her MN Teenager. I have never been the Ninja Mother who wanted the party at my house. I am also not the parent who recently told me that when her young daughters will be teenagers, she will enforce a ‘No-Tolerance Policy’- How I wish it were that easy!!!
I know very well that older MN Teenagers go to parties on the weekends with their school friends and Facebook friends. (Younger MN Teenagers -13 and 14 – definitley should not be at these parties!!!) My older MN Teenagers also know that I do not want them to drink alcohol or use illegal drugs (including medical marijuana!) I have been very clear with them about how I feel. After this, I have to trust their judgement and believe that they will make good decisions. (And pray that they do not do anything really stupid!)
What are my other choices?: (1) To lock them in the house, I am pretty sure Child Services would not find my methods acceptable. (2) To go with them to the party, I am pretty sure this would end the party. (3) To tell them that they cannot attend the party with all their friends. I am pretty sure they would sneak around and still find a way to be at the party.
Honestly, I am very happy that my young MN Teenager did not want to go to Wiz Khalifa’s recent concert like some of her 13 and 14 year old friends who attended and reported weed being thrown from the stage to the audience. But there will be other concerts and in a couple years plenty of high school parties to attend. As I learned from the older MN Teenagers, it is a tricky and some times treacherous path when it comes to raising/educating our children about the real world! If they do not learn to navigate parties in high school, what will happen when they get to college and arrive at their first frat party?
Ninja Mom’s Advice – Keep the lines of communication open with your MN Teenagers: Be clear about your expectations, ask questions and listen to what they have to say – be careful not to over react and dictate. Yes, you may have to bite your tongue! Have clear rules: What time is their curfew? Yes, they need to be home at a certain hour! Have clear and real consequences for breaking rules that you can legislate. I have taken away car keys, phones, computers and doors – make sure the consequence is something You too can live with.
It is not easy. If it were, I would not have as many wrinkles (character lines) and gray hairs!
PS – Young, Wild and Free is played all over the radio and this week is #6 in the iTunes chart. Check it out on You Tube as well.